There are millions of people on social media but there are a million more people who are on social media ALL DAY LONG. There is that one person, one follower, one stalker, who comments and likes everything you post. You could be asking a rhetorical question while on a ranting spree and that person has what seems like a real life answer. Please, sir/ma’am, go and sit down somewhere! Also, remove yourself from social media for the remainder of the week.

Usually, if you have children (because no one just has one child anymore) one would expect you to be tending to your children or any family involved activities. Usually, if you have jobs (because no one person has one job anymore) one would expect you to actually be productive with completing work tasks during your allotted work hours. However, these same people with full time jobs and families find time to dedicate ALL DAY of their lives to being on social media. Every post, every picture, every flyer, every Facebook memory; you manage to be there for all of it. GO AWAY!

Please help me understand why you have nothing else to do during the day? WHY ARE YOU NOT RINGING MY ITEMS AND CHECKING ME OUT? WHY AM I STILL IN THIS LINE FOUR HOURS LATER WITH ONLY TWO ITEMS? Girl, please put down the dumb (smart) phone and check me the hell out before I walk the hell out.

I’m literally baffled that people spend so much time in other people’s business. You don’t even know Jonathan or Stephanie yet you find ALL of THEE TIME to criticize their every move. Why does your niece on your father’s side know about Stephanie’s business. Does Stephanie even know you?

Since I’m not a biased person, one would also wonder why Stephanie and Jonathan are sharing their entire lives on social media. I don’t care that you just left White Castle’s to get a twenty-case of burgers. You will also have a twenty-case of the shits! I’m convinced that people who post their every move to social media have no real friends or support system. They have no one to talk to, no best-friends to vent to and no shoulder to cry on.

I challenge all (everyday all day) social media users and stalkers to go and find a LIFE. Get a hobby! Go to WORK!  STOP COMMENTING! Get off of his page! Stop forming opinions! Finish that paper that is three weeks overdue! Mend a broken relationship! Just do all of this while being off of social media.

ONE MORE THING:

Please refrain from commenting on all of my pictures and status updates.

Sincerely,

We’re not even friends on here

Advertisements

I used to think that I was extremely mean to guys and I did not give them a fair chance at shooting their shots. Now I know why I was mean! Guys want to shoot their shots even if you all are no longer on the same court.

Being cordial and being a complete jerk are two different things but they usually end up being one in the same. When it comes to most of my ex boyfriends, I mainly feel this way. PSA: I’m not interested in ever getting back with you so don’t even waste your time. I can be terribly pleasant to you and even entertain everyone amongst a group of friends. I can hold an influential conversation with you while reminiscing about the good old days of our past. Ohhh but please be conscious that I probably despise you and your lack of manhood.

If your relationship did not work out then that’s the end of that. What if it has been a few tears and both parties have seemingly changed? If this is the case then you should give it another chance. Great things happen with second and third chances. However, if you were given a fifth, sixth, seventh and eight chance then your ass should be put on the “DO NOT EVER THINK ABOUT OR CONTACT ME LIST”. Going back to an old relationship often gives one hope that things can revert back to the way they were. People often think about the good times and convincingly tends to have no recollection of the bad. When I’ve had more bad times than good; as the Spanish say, ADIOS!

I can count on my hands the number of times that I have gotten back with an ex. Be it for pleasure or because I truly had faith that it would work; I just can’t see myself repeating this same behavior. I don’t doubt that some of my ex-boyfriends are really good guys. I just don’t think that they have maturated in MEN.

I have been watching so much Oprah and Iyanla: Fix My Life that I truly believe that I have fixed myself and grown spiritually and mentally. I’m not a person of many chances but if you have somehow managed to get more than two chances out of me then you should know that you’re the asshole who messed up. I’m not perfect by an inch but I’m a decimal away from being the woman you wish you had.

Question at hand is: Have you taken an ex back and if so, why?

Friends! How many of us have them? That is the question that has been asked for over 20 years but no one has seemed to find a conclusive answer. When you have real friends, do you even know that they are your REAL friends. We are all waiting for the real answer but most importantly, the big question.

Picture this: You’re at a concert with a friend and the both of you are talking and laughing hysterically. One friend peeps something odd and grabs your arm tightly. You peep what the friend see’s and the both of you grab each other while simultaneously clutching your pearls. You saw it and you know you saw it because you could not have seen anything else.

You saw your mutual friend’s man walking past with another woman on his arm. You saw him caress the smalls of her back while staring you in the face. You saw him immediately put his head down and stare at the ground as he realized who you were. YOU SAW HIM! You saw him without your friend.

As true and real friends, you deliberate on whether to call up your girl and tell her what you saw. One person has been chosen to do the dirty deed. You decide to text because a phone conversation seems to scare you a little. You tell your friend about her cheating boyfriend and you describe the scenario from top to bottom.

You expect to be the shoulder that will be needed for comfort and instead you get “What was he wearing and what color were his shoes”. Bitch, I made a conscious decision to inform you about this no count dude and all you can ask about is the color of his shoes.

The boyfriend denies that it was ever him and the friend believes him. Once again, they are Facebook happy and all in love and shit. You are extremely livid, not because she took him back but simply because you are the most genuine and honest friend that she has and she called you a LIAR.

Question being: If you saw your friend’s spouse clearly cheating, would you tell your friend?