Posted in The Truth

I’m Not Better Than You! I’ve Outgrown You!

Growth is inevitable and some people won’t be able to understand that. You don’t have to explain to someone why you no longer desire to stoop to their level of being. You have simply experienced the spirit of growth. What you used to love is now something that you can barely tolerate. Don’t doubt that you’ve grown.

You will definitely be called lame, old, boring, or different. You might find yourself sitting alone on your couch trying to figure out if you did something wrong. You might feel guilty about no speaking about your feelings out loud to that particular group of people or person. You owe no explanation other than, “I’ve outgrown you”.

It’s not something to be afraid of. Activities that used to highly entertain you now feel like a chore or obligation. You would rather stay home, cook, and catch up on some of your favorite shows. You now actually would rather just chill at your best friends house and have pizza and beer. That’s your new type of entertainment.

There are certain people that you don’t like being around anymore. They drain all of your energy. They make you feel parental with all of their burdens that they place on you. You feel incompetent at times because of how they choose to speak to you or how they never own up to anything. You’re not better than them. You have simply outgrown them. Your tolerance for ignorance and susceptibility has depleted. The energy that you have now is something that you must preserve.

If you find yourself always questioning your decisions when “That person or those people” are around then it’s time to move on from them. You don’t even question yourself that much. Have you realized that you have been more of the stable friend versus the other way around? Can you depend on that person as much as they depend on you? Will they show up for you as much as you show up for them?

You are not meant to stay stagnant all of your life. Growth is the next step on your journey of finding your inner and outer peace. Accepting that some people will not continue on that journey with you is going to be difficult. If you love yourself then you will find the strength and courage to move on.

Posted in The Truth

Growth, Is That You?

When you think of growth, you think of all sorts of things. Particularly, I think of the growth of one’s edges. I often like to welcome them back. In this instance, the type of growth that I’m referring to is maturity. When you look back on your younger self, are you embarrassed or ashamed of who you were then? I’ll raise my hand for all of you.

Being that I’m still young and under thirty, some people (Older) would probably disagree with growth at this age and reference that “I still have a lot to learn”. I won’t disagree with that part, however, I have learned a lot in the past five years about myself. Relationships, whether they are friendships, partnerships, or personal relationships, have been quite the area of growth for me. Let’s do a little bullet point presentation of some of the things that I’ve simply grown out of over the past five years.

  • Pleasing people
  • Caring
  • Fake friends
  • Broke ass dudes
  • Dudes with several children
  • Dudes with no jobs
  • Dudes with no ambition
  • Did I mention “Not giving a f**k about other’s opinions”

This list can literally go on into a dissertation entitled “How I Stopped Giving  A F**k and Stacked My Money Up”. Honestly, five years ago, I was a complete mess. I was very naive and easily manipulated. I was quick to please and slow to catch on. I wanted to please everyone around me and I wanted attention for all the wrong reasons. Fresh out of college, I found myself doing a lot of things that I now regret. I was dating the wrong guys and befriending some of the wrong people. Fast forward to five years later and I’m absolutely enamored with the woman who I’ve become. I know better and I do better; not because of wanting to please others but because better feels good to me.

I’m better in my friendships, partnerships, and I’m still growing in the relationship area. However, I know I’m better in that also. I’m doing better with those things. Maturity is one hell of a drug!

If you could give your 22/23-year-old self advice now, what would be the main point that you would want your younger self to know?