If you’re reading this, I’m going to assume that you’re almost or over the age of thirty. Why would I assume this? Simply because I hope you know that you’re ALMOST THIRTY.

Everywhere you turn and every post that your scroll past, there it is. It stares you right in the face and sometimes it even taunts you. The simple hashtag “Relationship Goals” can undoubtedly ruin your day. Why is that? Why do we have such low expectations of partnerships? Just because you see a picture that portray’s happiness does not mean that it’s actually true. I simple despise that hashtag! Not because I’m jealous or scorned but simply because it’s just another marketing tool.

So many young people or people in general yearn for a relationship. Social media increases that desire with all the perfect pictures. That’s when things start to go left. Examples of “Relationship Goals” are plastered all over the internet and is reeling everyone in. Why do you have the same relationship goals as someone whom you’ve never met? I understand that we as a society idolize celebrities. I understand that celebrities are influential. However, I’m a bit confused as to why I would want the same kind of relationship as Drake and Rihanna or Ciara and Russell Wilson. I don’t personally know either of them and I don’t know what they do or how they interact with each other behind the camera’s.

You basically want someone to take pictures and stunt with on social media. You want to be seemingly happy. Does that mean that you’re OK with being alone while Facebook or Snapchat is not live? Do you actually know what you’re looking for in a relationship? Do you know who you are with or without a relationship? Who are you trying to impress? Do they even know you?

People have invested their time in your relationship via social media by liking all of your posts. Four months into the relationship, every picture of “Him” has vanished. You may not think it’s anyone else’s business but you owe every invested follower an explanation. What happened? I thought you all were “Relationship Goals”. Soon after, you find yourself in another relationship one month later and the hashtag resurfaces. It becomes a ploy. People start judging you and your social media becomes a platform for bullying.

It’s rarely about goals when you simply want to “Make Pretend”. If that’s the case, you should simply take a picture everywhere you go and make it #Lifegoals. Figure out who you are and what you like to do. Find something that sparks your interest and implement it into your life goals. Go traveling (around the world and not just to Miami), start a support group, write a book, direct a webseries, become a famous blogger, go back and finish school, reconnect with your childhood friend, etc.

Again, you’re almost thirty! Stop with the #RelationshipGoals and plan some #Lifegoals. It’s not cute nor attractive. Know who you are and what your limits are before you enter a relationship. Be sure that its REAL and then decide whether or not to share with the world.

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There are millions of people on social media but there are a million more people who are on social media ALL DAY LONG. There is that one person, one follower, one stalker, who comments and likes everything you post. You could be asking a rhetorical question while on a ranting spree and that person has what seems like a real life answer. Please, sir/ma’am, go and sit down somewhere! Also, remove yourself from social media for the remainder of the week.

Usually, if you have children (because no one just has one child anymore) one would expect you to be tending to your children or any family involved activities. Usually, if you have jobs (because no one person has one job anymore) one would expect you to actually be productive with completing work tasks during your allotted work hours. However, these same people with full time jobs and families find time to dedicate ALL DAY of their lives to being on social media. Every post, every picture, every flyer, every Facebook memory; you manage to be there for all of it. GO AWAY!

Please help me understand why you have nothing else to do during the day? WHY ARE YOU NOT RINGING MY ITEMS AND CHECKING ME OUT? WHY AM I STILL IN THIS LINE FOUR HOURS LATER WITH ONLY TWO ITEMS? Girl, please put down the dumb (smart) phone and check me the hell out before I walk the hell out.

I’m literally baffled that people spend so much time in other people’s business. You don’t even know Jonathan or Stephanie yet you find ALL of THEE TIME to criticize their every move. Why does your niece on your father’s side know about Stephanie’s business. Does Stephanie even know you?

Since I’m not a biased person, one would also wonder why Stephanie and Jonathan are sharing their entire lives on social media. I don’t care that you just left White Castle’s to get a twenty-case of burgers. You will also have a twenty-case of the shits! I’m convinced that people who post their every move to social media have no real friends or support system. They have no one to talk to, no best-friends to vent to and no shoulder to cry on.

I challenge all (everyday all day) social media users and stalkers to go and find a LIFE. Get a hobby! Go to WORK!  STOP COMMENTING! Get off of his page! Stop forming opinions! Finish that paper that is three weeks overdue! Mend a broken relationship! Just do all of this while being off of social media.

ONE MORE THING:

Please refrain from commenting on all of my pictures and status updates.

Sincerely,

We’re not even friends on here

Every other person that I know is addicted to social media and does not even recognize that they are. There are hundreds of different social media sites and people have on average five different social media accounts. I hate going out with my friends simply because they no longer know how to have real fun. Every second of every minute is spent with their faces buried in their phones, scrolling through Instagram and Facebook. No one knows how to have a conversation, so it’s pure silence at the table. Instead, everyone is pulling out their phones, wanting to make videos of nothingness and take terrible pictures.

I asked 26 of my friends if they could honestly give up their phones for one day and only 5 answered yes. ONE DAY! Some people can barely go one hour without logging on to one of their social media accounts. IT’S EVERYWHERE!Addiction

I have been to concerts, stage plays, church, comedy shows, graduations, and to the movie theater. I have also seen people logged on to social media sites at any given times during all of these outings. Why are you scrolling through Facebook while in the Movie Theater? You just spent $15 on a 3-D movie to actually read someone else’s status on Facebook for 2 ½ hours. That sounds like an issue/addiction to me.

Here’s a test: Only use your phone if someone calls or texts you. Otherwise do not use any internet. If you feel yourself wanting to touch your phone, log on to Instagram, make a funny video for Vine, or read a stranger’s Facebook status, then you have a problem. It’s called “I’m addicted to social media and I really like the attention that I get”. Put a group of people in a room and take away all technology. What do you get? Silence! Those same people are probably thinking about what’s going on in social media land and what are they missing. Social Media is a new drug! Everyone is itching and scratching to log on.